{"id":1070,"date":"2010-07-06T13:12:39","date_gmt":"2010-07-06T11:12:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/2010\/07\/06\/av-gammal-ohejdad-vana\/"},"modified":"2010-07-06T13:12:39","modified_gmt":"2010-07-06T11:12:39","slug":"av-gammal-ohejdad-vana","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/2010\/07\/06\/av-gammal-ohejdad-vana\/","title":{"rendered":"Av gammal ohejdad vana"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Ig\u00e5r skrev jag ett l\u00e5ng inl\u00e4gg om min gamla v\u00e4n os\u00e4kerheten, we go way back. Tyv\u00e4rr f\u00f6rsvann mitt inl\u00e4gg och allt mitt &#8221;slit&#8221; var f\u00f6rg\u00e4ves. Kommer tyv\u00e4rr inte ih\u00e5g mkt av det jag skrev. <\/p>\n<p>Hur som helst, min os\u00e4kerhet har alltid varit n\u00e4rvarande och jag kommer inte ih\u00e5g livet innan den blev min f\u00f6ljeslagare. Min os\u00e4kerhet s\u00e4ger till mig att jag inte duger, att jag inte \u00e4r n\u00e5got att ha, att jag \u00e4r v\u00e4rdel\u00f6s &#8211; s\u00e5 har det alltid varit. Fr\u00e5n tidiga skol\u00e5ren, d\u00e5 jag var reservkompisen som bara d\u00f6g om ordinarie &#8221;b\u00e4stisen&#8221; var upptagen p\u00e5 annat h\u00e5ll, till de sista \u00e5ren i skolan d\u00e5 jag visserligen hade kompisar men \u00e4nd\u00e5 alltid k\u00e4nde mig utanf\u00f6r. <\/p>\n<p>Tro mig, jag vet att jag duger och jag vet att jag inte \u00e4r v\u00e4rdel\u00f6s, men n\u00e4r jag m\u00e5r d\u00e5ligt d\u00e5 kommer den gamla vanan fram och inom mig ljuder orden &#8221;jag \u00e4r inget att ha, jag \u00e4r inget att ha&#8230;&#8221;. <\/p>\n<p>Os\u00e4kerheten visar sig ocks\u00e5 p\u00e5 andra s\u00e4tt, ett \u00e4r att jag har sv\u00e5rt att s\u00e4ga vad jag vill g\u00f6ra, vad jag tycker osv. F\u00f6r varf\u00f6r skulle n\u00e5gon vilja g\u00f6ra det jag vill, h\u00f6ra vad jag tycker? <\/p>\n<p>Ofta f\u00f6rst\u00f6r os\u00e4kerheten, s\u00e4tter k\u00e4ppar i hjulen. S\u00e5 l\u00e4tt g\u00e5r bra saker s\u00f6nder f\u00f6r att jag blir os\u00e4ker&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Men det \u00e4r slut med det nu. H\u00f6r du det, os\u00e4kerhet, jag t\u00e4nker inte l\u00e4ngre ha dig som st\u00e4ndig f\u00f6ljeslagare. G\u00e5! <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p class=\"excerpt\">Ig\u00e5r skrev jag ett l\u00e5ng inl\u00e4gg om min gamla v\u00e4n os\u00e4kerheten, we go way back. Tyv\u00e4rr f\u00f6rsvann mitt inl\u00e4gg och allt mitt &#8221;slit&#8221; var f\u00f6rg\u00e4ves. Kommer tyv\u00e4rr inte ih\u00e5g mkt av det jag skrev. Hur som helst, min os\u00e4kerhet har alltid varit n\u00e4rvarande och jag kommer inte ih\u00e5g livet innan den blev min f\u00f6ljeslagare. Min os\u00e4kerhet s\u00e4ger till mig att&hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/2010\/07\/06\/av-gammal-ohejdad-vana\/\">Read more &rarr;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[13],"tags":[170],"class_list":["post-1070","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-moblog","tag-osakerhet","xfolkentry"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p23rAr-hg","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":112,"url":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/2009\/04\/04\/den-forbannade-osakerheten\/","url_meta":{"origin":1070,"position":0},"title":"Den f\u00f6rbannade os\u00e4kerheten","author":"Mia","date":"04 april 2009, 01:58","format":false,"excerpt":"Har haft en bra dag med tr\u00e4ning, god sallad och trevligt s\u00e4llskap. Men p\u00e5 kv\u00e4llen fick jag bes\u00f6k av den f\u00f6rbannade os\u00e4kerheten som s\u00e4ger att jag inte duger, det var ett tag sedan senast och jag hade inte saknat den det minsta. Stora t\u00e5rar hade den med sig ocks\u00e5, s\u00e5\u2026","rel":"","context":"I \u201dom vardagen\u201d","block_context":{"text":"om vardagen","link":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/category\/blandat\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Pepsi Maxen \u00e4r slut.","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoppfull.nu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/090404-150x150.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":5141,"url":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/2026\/10\/13\/halla-bloggen-lever-du\/","url_meta":{"origin":1070,"position":1},"title":"Hall\u00e5 bloggen, lever du?!","author":"Mia","date":"13 oktober 2026, 04:49","format":false,"excerpt":"Nej, det verkar inte s\u00e5, tyv\u00e4rr. Det som jag trodde skulle bli en enkel process, visade sig bli mycket sv\u00e5rare. Det b\u00f6rjade redan med att jag var tvungen att komma p\u00e5 l\u00f6senord, dels till hoppfull.nu men ocks\u00e5 till min cPanel. Allt som f\u00f6rr var helt naturligt, allt jag kunde, det\u2026","rel":"","context":"I \u201dom vardagen\u201d","block_context":{"text":"om vardagen","link":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/category\/blandat\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":754,"url":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/2009\/10\/17\/inte-min-vecka\/","url_meta":{"origin":1070,"position":2},"title":"Inte min vecka","author":"Mia","date":"17 oktober 2009, 00:34","format":false,"excerpt":"Usch. M\u00e5r inte bra. Inte just nu och har inte gjort hela denna vecka. Kan egentligen inte s\u00e4tt fingret p\u00e5 vad det \u00e4r som jag d\u00e5ligt, eller k\u00e4nner mig deppig kanske jag ska skriva. M\u00e5nga sm\u00e5 saker som bildar ett stort o\u00f6verstigligt hinder. Och hur l\u00f6ser jag detta? Jo, som\u2026","rel":"","context":"I \u201dom barnl\u00f6sheten\u201d","block_context":{"text":"om barnl\u00f6sheten","link":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/category\/barnlosheten\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1281,"url":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/2010\/12\/03\/dag-3-mina-foraldrar\/","url_meta":{"origin":1070,"position":3},"title":"Dag 3: Mina f\u00f6r\u00e4ldrar","author":"Mia","date":"03 december 2010, 23:30","format":false,"excerpt":"Ja, var ska man b\u00f6rja egentligen. Inget direkt roligt \u00e4mne tycker jag, eller det hade det kanske varit om mina f\u00f6r\u00e4ldrar inte var som de \u00e4r. F\u00f6r ett par veckor sedan s\u00e5 gick jag och funderade p\u00e5 om jag kunde v\u00e4lja n\u00e5got av allt el\u00e4nde som funnits\/finns i mitt liv\u2026","rel":"","context":"I \u201ddecember 2010\u201d","block_context":{"text":"december 2010","link":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/category\/mia\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":844,"url":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/2010\/01\/24\/en-kansla-av-utanforskap\/","url_meta":{"origin":1070,"position":4},"title":"En k\u00e4nsla av utanf\u00f6rskap","author":"Mia","date":"24 januari 2010, 03:22","format":false,"excerpt":"N\u00e4r jag var liten var jag en reservkompis, jag d\u00f6g n\u00e4r de andras \"b\u00e4stisar\" var upptagna med annat. Jag kommer inte ih\u00e5g riktigt n\u00e4r detta b\u00f6rjade, antingen var det i lekis eller i f\u00f6rsta klass. Vi var sju flickor och 14 pojkar. Alla flickor lekte tv\u00e5 och tv\u00e5, jag blev\u2026","rel":"","context":"I \u201dom vardagen\u201d","block_context":{"text":"om vardagen","link":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/category\/blandat\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5181,"url":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/2026\/10\/15\/5181\/","url_meta":{"origin":1070,"position":5},"title":"Ett h\u00e5l som inte g\u00e5r att \u00e4ta bort","author":"Mia","date":"15 oktober 2026, 03:25","format":false,"excerpt":"Ett tomrum som k\u00e4nns i hela kroppen. F\u00f6rr f\u00f6rs\u00f6kte jag fylla det med mat, men vad h\u00e4nder n\u00e4r maten inte l\u00e4ngre fungerar som tr\u00f6st? Om sorg, gamla m\u00f6nster och tankar som tar sina egna v\u00e4gar.","rel":"","context":"I \u201dm\u00e5 bra\u201d","block_context":{"text":"m\u00e5 bra","link":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/category\/ma-bra\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoppfull.nu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/image.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoppfull.nu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/image.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoppfull.nu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/image.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoppfull.nu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/image.png?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hoppfull.nu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/image.png?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1070","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1070"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1070\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1070"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1070"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hoppfull.nu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1070"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}